Monday, September 22, 2008

My thoughts on Disillusionment

Working off of my last post, I've been thinking about what I said about disillusionment. It's just something I feel the need to mull over, because I often find myself wishing and sometimes praying for others to experience it. I guess I do this because my seasons of disillusionment have led to the best times of my life, over and above my few moments of, say, enlightenment or breakthrough. I'm not sure why that is, exactly, but I find that the pain and confusion are like the pangs of birth. Whenever there is a new life blooming, there seems to be groaning to usher it in.

So I find myself wondering, is this the way of life? Is this just how it works? Do we have to dismantle everything in order to lay a new foundation? Primarily, is there another way? Can we experience elation through enlightenment, or must we first enter into sorrow?

In the scriptures there are a few illustrations of what I'm talking about: "Weeping may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning," that kind of thing. But I also remember that according to the creation/fall story, women have childbearing pain because of the fall. It's not something that is part of the original plan; it's a result of our fallen nature. Maybe this is precisely the point of this story: that were we to be alligned with the holiness and goodness of God, then life would spring forth without pain, but because we cling to our own pride and live in selfishness and sin, we need to go through pain in the dismantling process, tearing apart the structure that we have built up through our fallen nature, in order to finally feel the freedom and vitality of the life of God growing in us.

Those are my thoughts.


the Eubanks said...

i like your new background. cool photo of the clouds.

Susanna Metzger said...

very good thoughts. I can really relate. Sometimes I get afraid of becoming so disillusioned that I'll be cynical to the point of driving people away. I know people who do that, and it's not enjoyable. So don't do that Jake.