Wednesday, April 21, 2004

I've decided that the the most repulsive thing on the internet is not pop-ups. Pop-ups, granted, are the most annoying things in existence since commercial jingles, but what I find more disgusting is the "YOU'RE A WINNER!" advertisements. Not only is it the fact that it's deceptive and cruel to tell people they have won something only for them to find out that they have to agree to some "special offer" in order to claim their "free prize" at "no cost." NO COST??? In the same sentence with "Pick one of these offers in which you will have to spend some cash"? Not only that. If it were only that, I could bear it. After all, some of those "special offers" might actually be things people might want to try. But it's not worth it at all for this main reason: by the time a poor fool has actually figured out that he or she does not wish to go through with said "special offer," and thus forfeit his/her "free prize," he or she has already given out his/her own email address. And from then on, there's no stopping the plethora of crappy email offers. Yes, my friend, you are in for a high tide of get rich schemes, savings deals, and even more "free prize" offers. It doesn't end. And the worst thing about it is, or maybe just the thing that tops it all off, is that I'm sure I should have been smarter about giving out my email address to low-life legal scam artists. But that dvd player looks pretty nice right now, ya know? First I need to find whoever it is that invented the pop-up, and, to avoid sending death threats over email I'll just say, make him unhappy. Then I'll need to go way back in history and find the one who came up with the word "free" as a marketing tool, and, well... do something about it. Anyway, that's all for tonight. I need to sleep.

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